Reflection.

Yay another week and another drop in the beastly steroids 🙂 popping three little disgusting chalky pills is way better than eight. The more I drop the better I feel and the more spoons I seem to collect! No more shakes, confusion and waffle, I can sleep unaided and my gerbil face is shrinking! Yay!

I am probably being a little ambitious but my body and brain actually feels like mine again, well except the small human being floating, tossing and turning in my tummy at 28 weeks. That feeling of a foot in the ribs will never stop being weird but still it no longer hurts to get out of bed or walk up the stairs and I no longer get stuck on the floor when I try and load the tumble dryer result! I won’t be applying for any strong woman competitions any time soon like, but finally my strength is back and the lights have been switched back on. I can lift small shopping bags and I can get out of the bath! Hurrah a proper soak without being stranded in the tub! Now I just need to get more pregnant, have a caesarean and this will all start to be impossible or an effort again!

Mind you I might not let on that I can do all of these things a little easier, I have quite enjoyed playing chief director from the sofa, ‘Matt can you paint the nursery like this, this needs to go in the loft, can you cut the grass, please can you carry this upstairs for me, oh please can you get me a drink?!’ I am natural born dictator! (Who am I kidding this is not new news for most!) My natural purpose is to fix things and do, not to sit in a chair all day so my desire to do things and get things done is getting stronger every day, shame it is Matt that is doing the do! The poor man, so tolerable, think I need to give him a break. I feel like I fell asleep in February and me and Rapunzel have woken up in June and we are ready to go go! That and its suddenly hit me I have EIGHT weeks until the planned C, I feel like the pressure is on.

So, amongst the weekly pokes and prods, the pills daily vitamin shakes and endless hospital appointments I feel a very blessed girl that I have got to this stage. I didn’t think this day would ever come, but then with Crohns you never do, every flare always feels like your last and that you will never recover. It’s time to get a back to me.

So as I sit here this morning, planning the next two months of my life writing baby lists, house lists, to do lists around my NHS schedule I realised upon reflection that it is about time I said thank you to all the people in my life who helped me get to this point. I don’t think I would feel so strong if I hadn’t had the support from so many amazing people. Friends and family are the best medicine you can have. I realise 2016 has been a toughy for most to keep up – baby news, turned 30, hospital trips, and the big engagement, I have certainly kept the card shops in business. I feel like I need to give people a break – so I promise to try and live a quiet normal life for a while. Maybe then others might get a look in 🙂 it’s about time, I’ve only took up half the year.

I get a little shy because I don’t think I can ever really repay or show people how much all of the kindness has kept me going. The amazing emails and messages I have had are untrue, the offers of help when everyone has busy lives and the lovely visitors that have landed on my doorstep to come and see me has broken up the mundane days. Not to mention the flowers, cards and little gifts I’m surrounded by at home, it’s all been unreal and makes me feel so loved. I am very lucky and grateful and will never forget what those have done for me. When I wake up every day I’m also happily reminded that I have a little person inside me, it makes me get all hormonal knowing that I’m never really on my own, even when I am on my own, so special.

I don’t think people actually read my blog so when I have bumped into faces I haven’t seen and they are up to date with my life its weird (so I get a little shy again) but amazing that people have actually taken an interest, you lot are awesome. I hope that I can repay the kindness in other people’s lives if they ever find themselves in a situation where they need help and TLC. Little bit of thought for others goes such a long way, it has rocked my world.

So back to reality… tea break over, today’s real life problem: how the hell have I accumulated 17 pairs of pyjamas (well I do know the answer) … but where am I going to fit them?! You hear about these mums that wear pyjamas on the school run – maybe I will have to be one of those mums? Hmmm.. or maybe not… guess a pyjama sort out needs to be added to the list …. !

 

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About crohnsmamashttps://crohnsmamascouk.wordpress.comMom blogger with Crohns Disease, the more active the crohns the more active the blog ! :)

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